Moments Like This
by Rhadeya
Summary: Jack is confused about what her relationship with Riddick is... Please R


Disclaimer: Jack, Riddick and PB don't belong to me. I just take em out to play once in a while :)  
Notes: This was a little bit of therapy for a RL problem so I appologise if it makes little or no sense LOL

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Standing on the brow of a deserted hill, I stare out at the darkening landscape and wonder where we go from here. It's been four years since we escaped the hell of that day on the planet, and yet I'm still unsure where we're going. I nearly didn't make it that day, but you pulled me through. Sometimes I wonder at the excuses we make, the reasons we strive to exist when there really isn't anything left to exist for. Every night since we escaped that Hell, I have seen Carolyn in my dreams, heard her tell me that everything is going to be ok.   
  
But everything isn't ok.  
  
I fell in love with you that day, the day you saved my life over and over again. You refused to sacrifice me when Johns wanted to use me as bait. You came back and killed the monster when I was trapped beneath that bone. And when the voice in my mind was telling me you'd left me there to die, you appeared in the mouth of the cave and saved me again.   
  
From that moment on, you held my soul in the palm of your hand.  
  
I always believed that you'd forever see me as that adoring child, even though I'm a woman now. I've had curves aplenty for a couple of years, and the hormones to match. As a red blooded female, I'd have to be blind not to find you attractive, but I never thought you'd see me as anything other than that sweet kid you saved back in Hell. Every time we docked at a new space port, you'd disappear for hours and come back smelling of some cheap perfume, while I lay in my cramped bunk and fantasised that it was me you wanted. But logic always prevailed and I convinced myself you'd never see the woman I'd become.  
  
How wrong I was.  
  
Last night, like every night before it, I lay awake and imagined you running those strong hands over my supple body, teasing me. Making me ready for you. I was so wrapped up in my fantasy that I didn't hear you come back to the ship, didn't see you as you passed my room. I was so seduced by the promise of bliss that your touch would bring, it took me a few moments to realise you really were touching me. I'm surprised you didn't laugh at me when my eyes shot open, cause I know my face must have shown my surprise. You just sat there on the edge of my bunk, your hand laid gently on my bare stomach, watching me. You saw the desire in my eyes and without a word, you began caressing me, just like I had dreamed you would. As we gave in to our passions, you whispered tenderly to me, telling me how precious I am to you. Held in your tender embrace, I finally understood what it is to be loved, to be cherished.  
  
*******  
  
I feel, rather than hear, you approach me and I know that now is the time I have to make a choice. Do I accept what happened last night and just let things unfold as they will? Or do I tell you I'm sorry and walk away, never to see you again? I know in my heart that I can't pretend nothing has happened, because things have changed between us. We can never go back to the way things were; we can't erase the events of last night and simply be the weird kid and the murderer she idolises any longer. As you slip your arms around my slender waist and hold me close, my heart screams at me to stay right here and pray you never let me go.   
  
I stare out at the greyness which covers the land around us, my mind in turmoil. I vaguely remember someone telling me that there are moments throughout our lives which decide our future. Like coming to a cross roads in our soul, where we make a choice which will guide us in our journey through life. Those moments, however brief, are the ones which define us, the ones which make us who we are. With a sudden insight, I realise that this is one of those moments. The choice I make here, now, will affect my life from now on.   
  
"There's nothing to fear Jack," you whisper tenderly to me, as if you're reading my thoughts. Slowly I release the breath I didn't realise I was holding and lay my head back against your shoulder. I don't know what the future will bring, or how long we may have together. All I know is that I can't leave you, because I'm right where I belong. Although life can be rough, we can never give up because it's within us to face whatever life throws at us. As long as we're together, nothing else matters. We can't foresee what will happen to us, we can only live for the moment.  
  
All we have are moments like this.  



End file.
